Whats the glycemic index on semen?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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