I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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