Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Help me help you realize you are a moron
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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