I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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