ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
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