We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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