So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
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Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
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After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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