Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
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