Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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