she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
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Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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