Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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