make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
