It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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