I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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