Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
