I'm lost and stupid without you.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
