Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
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you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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