where am i from again
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
