I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
wow bdsm is so cute
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
