We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
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this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
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I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.