I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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