It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
