so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
