i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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