i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
