I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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