You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize