sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
