The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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