are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
