first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
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