Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
