Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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