i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
