i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My cat gives me a boner
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
either way he was missing a nipple.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
