I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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