thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
