I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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