was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
