My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
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