brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Randomize
