Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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