THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
