Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize