All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
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