forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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