you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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