Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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