Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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