on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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